The Obituary of Mr. Prayer Meeting

Mr. Prayer Meeting died recently at the First Neglected Church, on Worldly Avenue. Born many years ago in the midst of great revivals, he was a strong, healthy child, fed largely on testimony and Bible Study, soon growing into
world-wide prominence, and was one of the most influential members of the famous Church family.

For the past several years, Brother Prayer Meeting has been failing in health, gradually wasting away until rendered helpless by stiffening of the knees, coldness of heart, inactivity and weakness of purpose and will power. At
the last, he was but a shadow of his former, happy self. His last whispered words were inquiries concerning the strange absence of his loved ones now busy in the marts of trade and places of worldly amusements.

Experts, including Dr. Works, Dr. Reform and Dr. Joiner disagreed as to the cause of his fatal illness, administering large doses of organization, socials, contests and drives, but to no avail. A postmortem showed that a deficiency of spiritual food coupled with the lack of faith, heartfelt religion and general support were contributing causes to his death.

Only a few were present at his death, sobbing over memories of his past beauty and power.

In honor of his passing, the Church doors will be closed on Wednesday nights, save the third Wednesday of each month, when the Ladies Pink Lemonade Society serves refreshments to the men’s handball team.”